Have you ever felt “attacked” for being successful in your direct sales business?

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Have you ever felt “attacked” for being successful in your direct sales business?

With the rise of social media, I have noticed a rise in “keyboard cowboys”.

These are the people that feel they can say anything, hidden in the shadows of a computer monitor, saying things they would never be bold enough to say face-to-face with the person they are insulting or bashing. When did it become okay for women to treat other women with so much disrespect?

For the sake of this blog, I want to take a couple minutes to shine a bright light into the dark spaces where those means girls hide (or in this case “keyboard cowgirls”) and share with you how and why you need to rise above their petty jealousy. Because at the end of the day, that’s all it is.

I just got home from Orlando (Disney brain over here), where I was a guest speaker at a social media conference. And I can’t help but find a direct correlation between the wicked stepsisters in Cinderella and the mean girls talking smack about you from behind their keyboards. When you think of them in this way, you realize how ridiculous it is to allow people like that to take up any place in your head or your heart.

Today I’m asking you to DISENGAGE.

Do not engage with those jealous “wicked stepsister” conversations anywhere on social media or in private online conversations.

People feel they can say whatever they want, hidden in the shadows of their computer monitor. But you will never change their jealous ways, and it is not up to you to do so. People either believe you and believe in you, or they don’t.

The more successful you become in this business, the more wicked stepsisters you will encounter. People who are jealous of your success, people who see your success and determine on their own that you did not do the work to get there and they will make excuses of WHY they think you are successful. Here’s a #TRUTHBOMB: People make excuses on how you got there, because they’re not WILLING to work as hard as you to get it.

“she must have cheated her way there”

“she must have paid her way there”

“she must be dishonest and sneaky”

When you have a mission that you’re passionate about, you WILL be targeted. You WILL be mocked. You WILL be defiled by others. But keep your chin up, Cinderella, they don’t understand you and they don’t understand your hustle. And they never will because most are not willing to ASK you how (or why) you did it. Truth is, all successful people have a target on their back. They want to see you successful, but not more successful than them. Once that tide turns, you will see the world in a whole new light. But it’s up to YOU to steady your course. Stay strong, be brave, and never give up.

You know that your hard work is what got you where you are and will continue to take you where you want to go. You do not need to waste one second attempting to defend yourself to people who are determined to undermine your success. Do not allow their negativity to distract you from the goals and dreams for yourself and your family.

You were made to change lives, do NOT change your course. Do NOT engage with them. And do NOT stoop to their level.

Disengage!

Do not listen to the haters and guard yourself against participating in the hating on someone else. And be weary of those who DO engage in those online drama fests, they live for it. You don’t have time to be engaging in those toxic conversations, you are better than that and you have work to do, princess! Choose to build someone up verses tearing them down. Remember what Thumper said in Bambi? “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothin’ at all.”

“HAVE COURAGE AND BE KIND.”– Cinderella

Do not allow yourself to be distracted by their mean girl ways!

It comes down to choices:

What happened to our society that allowed this behavior to be okay? And how do people not recognize that this kind of talk breeds anger, insecurities, DISTRACTION, and the lack of productivity on their part? And not just them, but everyone reading, everyone participating.

What if God was looking at your words and your brutal attack of a fellow woman, mother, and human being? Are you okay with breeding hate and anger? Are you okay with your daughter seeing those words? Are you so consumed with hate and fear that you lose your own morals to defile another woman? Choose your words wisely. Choose your friends even wiser. And choose the conversations you engage with on social media to mirror what you present to be on your timeline.

~Because real women don’t tear other women down.

 

~Real women understand there’s a little girl somewhere watching you tear down another woman and learning from your behavior.

Mind your social media~Mind your business~And get to work

What kind of choices are you making and engaging in? Just because they’re on social media and played out in private conversations and groups, doesn’t mean they aren’t seen. You’d be surprised at how many people know how to screen shot and hit send. And you’d be surprised how many people are tired of this kind of cowardly and indecent behavior on social media. If you see it, speak up. If you see it often, leave the group or conversation. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Do you want to complain, or do you want to WORK?

And they wonder why we get ahead…here’s your sign…

Melissa Fietsam

7 thoughts on “Have you ever felt “attacked” for being successful in your direct sales business?

    Sharon bielby said:
    January 30, 2018 at 8:43 pm

    AMEN

    Diane said:
    January 30, 2018 at 8:53 pm

    This is awesome….as you are. Keep doing you!!

    Heather Gilbertsen said:
    January 30, 2018 at 9:59 pm

    Melissa, I know you don’t need me to, but I went to bat for you more than once this week. I got your back, girl. You have been my mentor since day 1 of my business and you didn’t even know me – I just followed you – and I will continue to follow you – right past all the haters. Even my HOT would agree that you are a household name around here – I love & appreciate you.

    saratogareadingmama said:
    January 30, 2018 at 11:07 pm

    Preach it sister, preach! Love the #truthbombs. See you later, “keyboard cowboys”!

    Doris Pau Mendoza said:
    January 30, 2018 at 11:45 pm

    Preach sister!
    This is a very well-written piece.
    I’ve been watching you do you from afar this year without giving attention to any feedback good or bad. You go girl. You keep doing you.

    Pj said:
    January 31, 2018 at 1:36 am

    Do mean girls not grow up? In high school they knew how to push my thin-skinned daughter’s buttons – all it took was a look or a snicker or a comment about her bag not bring the right brand or a medical condition she has to deal with, and she’d get mad and in trouble. One of her teachers wrote on a pink card, “you cannot control what others say or do, but you CAN control how you react to them. Do not engage with them “. Seven years later she’s married with three little ones and six sisters in law aged 17-26. Imagine the hormones and drama! The card remains on my refrigerator and I remind her of it often – do not engage. It’s ridiculous that some mean girls don’t mature.

    carolyn taylor said:
    February 1, 2018 at 12:08 pm

    Good morning, Melissa. I just now got time to read your blog. LOVE IT. Although, I have not been a target yet, because I’m not THERE yet, but will be one day. It’s so sad that we have haters and jealous people all around us. satan never takes a day off. I totally agree that we ALL must rise to the occasion and show our better side. Thank you for putting into words what everyone faces at one time or another. Praying that haters read this and realize just how small (wishing I could make small in smaller font) their actions are and learn and grow to be better people. SHINE ON! and Happy Day!

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